...and then my boob popped out

May be a slight exaggeration, but it wasn't too far off.

Last week, I had friends over for Friday night drinks. It's something I wish I did more often, but my chaotic life doesn't usually allow it. Luckily for me, now that Glee has moved to Thursday nights, my Friday's are once again MY TIME. Fiiiinalllyyy...

It has been a while in between catch ups with my crew (who have never before been referred to as "My Crew", because well, let's be honest...I'm less ghetto and more like 'Omo' - I whiten and brighten) (and anywayz, they had better get used to it because it's too bloody hard writing out all 10 of their names), so when the RSVPs came back and a few said they would stop by, I went out and bought the best low-fat dip I could find! I then threw my low-fat atrocity dip at my own head and got something totally fat and delicious, and then compromised by adding carrots to the platter. THEN I went to the best cheap shop I could find!!...and got chips and choccie biscuits. Just because I'm watching what I eat, doesn't mean my loyal and lovely friends of 10+ years have to suffer. Plus I figured it wouldn't kill me if I gave in to temptation on the night and had a biscuit. Or two. Or a chip. Or 12. Or a mouth-watering, calorie-filled, juicy, greasy dollop of Pumpkin and Parmesan chunky dip. On a carrot.

Water water everywhere, even in my underwear...

LIES! NOT as fun as it looks, peeps...

...call me a literary genius, if you will. How clever is my heading, huh? Couldn't a truer word be spoken right now...

While everything has been going well of late, the last few days have been crap weather-wise here in little ol' Adelaide. Sun, then rain, then a bit of wind that slightly knocks over the branches on your conifers, then more rain...God hasn't been overly motivating when it comes to providing a little sunshine to brighten dull moods and lazy-asses. Like myself.

Good News!!!

Yes it is good news, readers: I ROCK!!! 

So I had an appointment with my diabetes doctor earlier in the week. It was just to check up on how things were going with "The Change", and to be completely honest, I was crapping my pants just a little bit. Like, not enough to warrant an old lady nappy or anything, but just enough to cause a curious odour. Too much information? Well, I don't care, because nothing and NO ONE could upset me with the mood I'm in! 

You know you're a teacher when...

OK, so here are some times in life when, as a teacher, you don't want to run into students you have previously taught:

The Slip Up #2

Not ONCE have I claimed that life - or this damn diet - was easy. If you say that I have, then I will seriously poke you in the eye with a fork. A big, fat, GREASY fork that is dripping in the juices of my failed attempt at restoring my health.

Sorry for the aggression friends, but I have officially had Slip Up #2. And my body HATES me for it right now. And honestly, I have possibly had a 'chick flick' kind-of moment where I took a good, hard long look in the mirror and just quietly hated myself.

I DID try to fight it however, so that counts for something, right???? RIGHT?!?!?

*NOTE* Please ignore ANY desperation you come across in this particular blog post. It is merely my lower intestine talking as it groans and churns in what can only be described as an attempt to make my life difficult and somewhat uncomfortable.

Belated Easter Greetings

Happy belated Easter y'all.

Hope you all celebrated and had a lovely weekend. Me? Well gosh, thank you SO much for asking. You really are a polite lot. I had a JAM-PACKED Easter experience that has left me exhausted and possibly a couple of kilos heavier than when I started.

Yep, the diet didn't get completely forgotten, but it did get shoved to the side like the ugly, younger sibling that no one ever really wanted. Including it's parents. Harsh, but true.

So "Ray" and I went camping with friends. Had a great time, got back to nature, watched a heap of kids scream and yell and innocently ride bikes around our camp site, thought of different ways to catch a kid by fashioning a trap of some sort...I am a teacher by trade, so it wouldn't have been dodgy. The catching of the kid I mean, not the fashioning of the trap. That would have been COMPLETELY dodgy considering I have NO concept of rope knots, cage-assembling and I tend to fluster under pressure. I mean, I nearly CRIED watching "Ray" put together an IKEA cupboard.


As usual, I digress...

The evidence that other people have funnier blogs than mine

Like I have said previously, I have been looking at other people's blogs. I've even decided to "follow" a few of them because they're good. And funny. And inspiring. And clearly, nothing like mine. One of the blogs I have been following, Just Making Convo, I only found recently but after reading one particular post, I was left NEARLY DEAD, as I was laughing so hard that I pretty much GAGGED on my own tongue. Yes. I said I GAGGED. ON. MY. TONGUE.


I know you don't believe me.